Rule 4 of our 10 Rules for Life is to Live in the Moment with a Positive Mindset. Living in the moment means being present – not getting stuck in the past or worrying about the future. Having a positive mindset can probably best be explained by the 2024 Derek Sivers book Useful, Not True. I love this short, simple book and have been giving copies away to my friends and family. Here is a short summary of how to make your thoughts useful, not true.
If you enjoy this summary, I highly recommend reading the book. Sivers masterfully builds his case in just 88 pages with zero fluff. I shared the book with business associates and have led book discussions. I also love picking it up and reading a few random pages. Bonus – the book is inexpensive and comes in multiple formats – learn more at sive.rs/u.
Almost Nothing People Say Is True
People say things all the time that can easily be contradicted. These perspectives feel real to them, but every perspective that someone shares could be prefaced with, “From my limited point of view, based on my experiences…”
Sivers notes, “We think of the past like it’s a physical fact – like it’s real. But we never have all the information – only interpretation. One story based on one point of view: that’s what we call ‘the past’.”
Even science isn’t true, it is only the current understanding of a subject that hasn’t been disproven by the scientific process yet!
Every time a person says, “I believe…”, what they say next is not true. And the more emotional the person is about their belief, the less likely it is true. If it was objectively true, they wouldn’t get upset, they would just point to the proof.
Ideas Should Be Useful, Not True
Once Sivers separates beliefs from truth and establishes that we primarily speak about beliefs, we are challenged to think about the beliefs we have. Is our mindset helping us or hurting us?
Our beliefs create our emotions (fear, anger, sadness, excitement, etc.) Emotions create our actions. Since our beliefs are not true, we should at least have beliefs that lead us to useful actions.
Sivers defines “useful” as, “whatever ultimately helps you do what you need to do, be who you want to be, or feel at peace.”
Are the current beliefs and ideas that form your mindset useful?
Reframe and Adopt What Works for You
Since our beliefs are not true (just a perspective), and our perspectives create our emotions and actions, why not make them useful?
Sivers encourages us to reframe – to look at the situation in many different ways to find new perspectives that we hadn’t considered before. You may think, “but I can’t help the way I feel,” as if it is out of your control and you have no choice. But you have a choice. Your perspective is not true, so can you at least make it useful?
We are all forced to make hard choices throughout our life. No choice is the best in itself; it becomes the best once we choose it. Adopt a mindset that is useful and works for you, at least in the moment.
Summary
Reading Useful, Not True has helped me realize that a positive mindset is more than being optimistic, it is making your thoughts useful. Being optimistic in a situation when base rates suggest you are likely to fail won’t be useful. Live in the moment and be ready to reframe and adopt the mindset that is most useful to you now.
Please let us know your thoughts about Personal Kaizen Rule 4 and our summary of Derek Sivers’ book, Useful, Not True in the comments below.
